Rewriting my WIP and my life.

Sometime last week I reached the final word on my WIP An Unexpected Desire. I immidiately started the rewrites since I want to finish the second draft for May month end.
Since the story was being written for a blog story a lot of background details, character building and character interaction with scenes and other characters are missing. So the rewrite is a very detailed one. I have already added almost ten thousand words and a couple new chapters. I also included more interaction between the two main characters and am now working on a scene between Fiona and her friend Shania. My aim is to show Shania reaching out to Fiona all the time, but Fiona being too wrapped up to see a true friend right there before her eyes, a mistake most of us make in our lives.

The rewrites are going slow and I am being lethargic. This is usually the point in my work where I loose faith in it. Where I start to ask the questions as: Is it good enough? Who will want to read this crap? Is this character believable? Is this scene believable? Is my MC growing and learning? And since there is a killer twist towards the end, I know I have to start hinting at it, adding some dramatic irony, let my reader see it but not my MC, but do it without placing a big red tag on it. Writing is easy yes, but rewriting is tedious if you want to create something worth reading.

On a personal note, I went through an experience in my personal life this weekend that is occupying a lot of my thinking time. I am facing a challenge in my life that I always thought I knew exactly what I would do if this time ever came. But you know sometimes you shouldn't commit yourself to what your reaction to something tragic would be, because sometimes you find yourself staring into the mirror at an image of a woman you promised yourself never to become.
Another thing to never do; is never think you understand what someone is going through, or what they are experiencing until you have gone through or experienced it yourself. Like my character Fiona, I am learning a lot of the brunt facts about life and the harshness it offers to one who is always faithful, understanding and independent. I am learning to cope with life's harhness and fight for the things I love and hold dear to me. Because sometimes, we need to put our pride aside and just do what needs to be done to keep our lives the way we want it to be.